Victory Road Inbox

[almosthandsome]

Hey there buddy! You've reached Jack - the cool dude from outer space! Leave me a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I remember to!

Comments

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[almosthandsome]

u better not b serious bcuz if u ruined my jeans from back home i swear 2 a god i dont believe in i will shave u entirely while u sleep

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[goldeneyeball]

now dont do anything too crazy were friends remember

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[almosthandsome]

those pants were bespoke jw

by the most expensive tailor in the galaxy

they were literally made 4 my ass & no other pair of pants makes my ass luk THAT inhumanly amazing

u owe me magic ass space pants jw

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[goldeneyeball]

where am i going to get magic ass space pants????

fine ill spot you a trip to a tailor if tailors are even still a thing but do not shave me ill fight you

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[almosthandsome]

u killed my fave pants

my fave fucking pants jw

i need retribution

id kick ur ass in a fite anyway

im a street kid i fite like a friggin rabid skag

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[goldeneyeball]

you wont if youre trying to shave me! dont forget im nuts you cant predict anything ill do

just find a way to shrink your ass then you can fit in the pants again problem solved

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[almosthandsome]

if im trying 2 shave u im holding a razor

think about that

dont friggin joke theres probably a pokemon that can do that

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[goldeneyeball]

no theres not jack theres no shrink your ass pokemon

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[almosthandsome]

u sure about that?

i mean really really sure?

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[goldeneyeball]

yes im sure because if there was there wouldnt be people walking around with fat asses!

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[almosthandsome]

thats not how shrinking works

u shrink entirely & keep ur proportions

im from space i kno this shit

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[goldeneyeball]

what the fuck are they shrinking in space we arent in space and theres no ass shrinking pokemon im sorry i messed up the laundry my pants got it too do you know how hard it is to find pants as long as i need them

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[almosthandsome]

we shrink all kinds of things in space

ur pants r replaceable & u can get pants altered

i can never get another pair of hyperion bespoke jeans that r completely impervious to all stains

i still say theres a pokemon that could shrink u

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[goldeneyeball]

maybe if youre good santa will bring you a new pair

were gonna have to agree to disagree buddy because i say theres not

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[almosthandsome]

i dont think thats how santa works

i say there is

im gonna find 1 & prove it 2 u

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[goldeneyeball]

fine find me that pokemon and shrink me and ill buy you the best pants this world has to offer